The new boy: gone. I don't think my heart was really in it, and he was nice and all, but there was just no spark. And I thought maybe it would happen in time, because I've fallen for friends in the past (not that it's worked before, but whatever), but I was thinking way too much about it. And I figured if I had to think that much, then it was a bad sign. And I asked one of the guys at work so I could get a guy's perspective (incidentally, it was one who does NOT know the whole sad story, and one who has not previously given me any sort of relationship advice), and he said you can tell right away if it's something you should pursue, if there's that connection, and if it's not right there, right now, well, then why waste your time? He took it a step further and said if anything ever happened to make him realize he couldn't marry the person, he would stop everything just like that.
Just for kicks, I was reading my now-defunct old blog this evening. So for the time being, instead of posting new entries, I'll just re-post old ones. Actually I see that while the names and faces and locations have changed, the big important things haven't, so I'm not any better off now than I was then. I'll have to keep chalking it up to experience, I guess, and hopefully one day I'll learn.
This is what I miss about my old job:
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 12:49 PM
Subject: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
[information about the people they signed]
-----Original Message-----
From: Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:01 PM
To: Molly
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
Wow we just added a ton of star power :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:03 PM
To: Ryan
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
I know, right? [Mutual friend] and I are commiserating over the lack of [certain favorite player] on the list.
-----Original Message-----
From: Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:22 PM
To: Molly
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
So does that mean he is not coming back?
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:28 PM
To: Ryan
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
It doesn't mean anything for sure. He hasn't signed anywhere yet (or it hasn't been announced), and of course as you pointed out, he is as old as the hills and may retire to spend time with the missus and the little [family name] boys. I saw that [another person] and his wife, just had their third kid - that is one fertile family.
-----Original Message-----
From: Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:30 PM
To: Molly
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
HAHAHA...you crack me up. I guess I will have to spend a great deal of time consoling you and [mutual friend] if [certain favorite player] doesn't come back and the fact that we have no [other player who is dumb as a rock but funny]...whatever will you two do? I guess we still have [yet another player] "hey I'm winter" [with a cool nickname].
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:33 PM
To: Ryan
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
Good ol' Winter. He's married now, too, you know. Maybe [another person] will be single. His [picture] is fairly nice. But certainly, I will need a great deal of consoling. (Not over [dumb-as-rocks player], though he was funny.) I feel sure that [mutual friend] will find a new [favorite] among the players... ;)
-----Original Message-----
From: Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 1:48 PM
To: Molly
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
HAHAHA...I am sure she will. Why can't we ever have a good team? Why do we continually have to suck? I would like to see us win more than 30 games at home. Did you know that they offered me a tryout for the [team]? They saw my cannon of an arm and the fact that I could throw from very shallow center to the pitcher's mound without a bounce. I think I may make the team. My average couldn't be any lower than [former player who was bad]'s. :)
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 2:00 PM
To: Ryan
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
See, what had happened was that they got you confused with that other Ryan [last name] and they thought you were already under contract with somebody else. Otherwise they would've signed you. I wonder if "[bad player's nickname]" will sign on with anyone.
We have to suck because the [parent club] want to beat us down. They want morale to be low. They will probably sign Barry Bonds to go play at [the Double-A affiliate]. And Michael Jordan will come out of retirement again to play there as well.
-----Original Message-----
From: Ryan
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 2:02 PM
To: Molly
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
Are you being sarcastic or are they really trying to beat us down? By God we are the crown jewel of minor league baseball. Lets go be affiliated with the 75-time World Champion Cubs (in my mind). I am better than the other Ryan [last name]. He, and the rest of the baseball world, just don't know it yet.
-----Original Message-----
From: Molly
Sent: Wednesday, January 12, 2005 2:03 PM
To: Ryan
Subject: RE: [THE PARENT CLUB SIGNED SOME PEOPLE]
I was being sarcastic...
Posted by Molly
at 11:58 PM EDT
