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Tue 08/22/2006
put me in coach, I'm ready to play

Those pesky Redbirds are at it again, annoying me as they are wont to do. (I guess that’s a good distraction, though.) Today’s article in the Commercial Appeal illustrates the point I made (in an earlier post, which I don't feel like looking up right now) about how the nice writers don’t write game stories (I hope there was a sidebar, because if not, the score was all the readers got) and brings up another point that annoys me, even though it probably shouldn’t.

 

Here’s the thing. The president/GM considers himself a baseball purist. (Which is good! I appreciate this!) This means that he does not like on-field promotions. In principle, this is okay, too, because, yes, I happen to think that you should come to watch the game, because the game is what’s important. And when I worked there in Memphis, my goal (which I didn’t reach, but I tried) was to run things like they run them in the Majors. Since there are no dizzy bat races in Major League Baseball, it follows that you should not have them in minor league baseball.

 

Except.

 

Minor league baseball is different! At some point, you have got to accept that you are not in the Majors. (This sucks for the players, as well as the employees, unless you aspire to the minors, which, well maybe some of the front office does, but probably not the players. I digress.) And the president/GM, in the article (see, I am making a point, really!), says, "I've always maintained that people don't really come to AutoZone Park for the baseball, but for the entertainment value, the family experience, for a group outing."

 

They do, in fact. Most normal people (unlike, say, me) do not go to baseball games to watch the games. They go to drink the (overpriced) beer and eat the (overpriced) hot dogs and nachos, and talk to their friends, and to watch other drunk adults spin around on a bat and then weave over toward first base while trying not to fall into the dugout. And might I add, the Redbirds have cheerleaders. They don’t want to do promotions, but they have cheerleaders. Yeah, that’s pure baseball for you. Anyway.

 

Now that I am not working in baseball, I go watch the games like a good little fan. And the highlight of any Durham Bulls game is usually the sumo wrestling. Or figuring out which player is not in the lineup because he got arrested, or suspended for throwing his bat at the umpire, or whatever the latest off-field occurrence was, but, you know, you can’t bank on that drawing the fans. (Heh.) But the team is boring to watch. And if I say that, then it is bad. Because I will watch bad baseball, just because it’s baseball, but I cannot get into the Durham Bulls this season. I think it is because they are affiliated with Tampa Bay, and it’s just not good.

 

Back to the Redbirds. From the article, again: “[The president/GM] does not like these typical minor-league gimmicks for several reasons: They can disrupt the flow of the game, they hold the potential for problems if some fan wants his ‘15 minutes of fame,’ and the ‘integrity of the game on the field is the backbone of what we do,’ he said.” (Integrity of the game. RedHots cheerleaders. These things, they do not match.)

 

And here’s a quote that I’m pulling out because it’s funny: "I don't like that stuff, either," [the manager] said. "And I don't think any of the players do. Ring-around-the Rosie by adults jumping in chairs is kind of childish." (He was described in an earlier article as displaying his “customary earnestness” and that is very true.)

 

So, in sum: the Redbirds front office believes that it is about the baseball, so they do not have “gimmicky” between-inning games. But they also think that people do not come out to see the baseball; rather, they come for the atmosphere. And the Redbirds are all about the integrity of the game on the field, but they let cheerleaders trot out there every other inning. (And I don’t think the players mind that, I have to tell you.)

 

This all seems to run counter to common sense. If people don’t come to see the baseball, then give them something to come for. They should accept that they are a minor league team and just do the damn promotions, and if I have to put up with the cheerleaders, then so be it. As long as they don’t have an on-field emcee. (Yes, Durham Bulls, I’m looking at you.) Because that is just dumb.

 

(Okay, and I have to admit that I did enjoy the article today. The articles are usually decent. It’s just that they’re not about the game.)


Posted by Molly at 11:32 AM EDT
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